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Get to know China’s air defense zone

One of the biggest Asia-related news items in recent weeks is China’s establishment of an Air Defense Identification Zone (ADIZ) over the East China Sea. Yes, China beat you to it.

Kerry’s acknowledgement that Iran could play role in Syria talks supported by fact that Iran already plays role in Syria

No need to commit to anything so groundbreaking this early on in what has effectively become a regional war, increasingly dragging in neighboring Lebanon and Iraq.

[VIDEO] Mayor of Toronto either attempting to murder a woman or save her from an unknown assailant

Having totally lost his mind, Mayor Rob Ford gingerly marched across the chamber, attempting to kidnap and possibly kill an innocent old woman.

NEWS BRIEF: Obama apologizes to Americans who are losing shitty, substandard insurance plans

The president has yet to apologize to those Americans who, over the years, have been impacted negatively by laws banning child labor, mandating the use of seat belts, and setting a health and safety code for establishments serving food.

NEWS BRIEF: Kerry reassures Saudis U.S. shares their deranged, reckless goals

Meeting with Saudi officials, U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry explained that the U.S. and Saudi Arabia shared common goals in Syria (where Saudi Arabia continues to recklessly support rebels with questionable ties to Al Qaeda), Egypt (where Saudi Arabia lent its support to the July 2013 coup that overthrew a democratically-elected government), and Bahrain (which, of course, it invaded in March 2011).

Kim Jong Un awarded economics PhD for country’s groundbreaking work in the area of not having an economy

North Korean leader Kim Jong Un was awarded an honorary doctorate in economics by a Malaysian university for his extensive work in maintaining the total absence of a national economy of any kind at all whatsoever.

Qaddafi’s wife demands rotting corpse of former dictator for who knows what sort of sick, sexual thing

In the latest display of her shameless wantonness, Safia Farkash has demanded that her former lover’s rotting corpse be presented to her immediately.

Shit’s about to get real: Mubarak to be released from prison

Lawyers for deposed Egyptian leader Hosni Mubarak announced today that the former president will be released from prison shortly. “It’s like in Batman, where once the city is taken over by Penguin, the Joker is let out of prison,” a spokesperson for the military explained Monday.

FYI: Obama playing golf with Larry David while Egyptians massacred

Despite the deaths of nearly 1,000 protesters in Egypt (Left), President Obama was able to enjoy playing a few rounds of golf with comedian Larry David (Right). Anyhow, we just thought you should know.

In latest Obama foreign policy success story, U.S.-backed government in Egypt kills everyone

After tacitly supporting a military-led coup against the democratically-elected government of Mohammad Morsi in Egypt last month, President Obama watched as, finally, the military got down to business and started massacring people in the streets. Over 100 were said to have been killed in clashes on Wednesday.

Hate to tell you, but Bahrain thing actually still happening

Remember when the people of Bahrain started protesting against their brutal government? Yeh, us neither. It has been going on since February 2011.

Obama: Trayvon Martin actually President of the United States

“Trayvon was actually the commander-in-chief of the U.S. armed forces and the leader of the free world,” Obama explained, before adding that “Vice President Joe Biden and George Zimmerman are the same person as well.”

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