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NEWS BRIEF: Obama apologizes to Americans who are losing shitty, substandard insurance plans

President Obama apologized Thursday to the millions of Americans who, because their extremeley shitty insurance policies don't meet standards established as part of the Affordable Care Act,  will need to take a few minutes and find policies that do.

President Obama apologized Thursday to the millions of Americans who, because their extremely shitty insurance policies don’t meet new standards established as part of the Affordable Care Act, will need to take a few minutes and find policies that provide actual coverage and not just pretend coverage, as was previously the case.

President Barack Obama today offered his apologies to those Americans who had crappy health insurance policies that didn’t meet new standards set by the Affordable Care Act and thus will need to find new plans that provide adequate coverage. The Experts noted, however that the president has yet to apologize to those Americans who, over the years, have been impacted negatively by laws banning child labor, mandating the use of seat belts, and setting a health and safety code for establishments serving food.

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